Monday, April 30, 2007
Thursday, April 5, 2007
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Monday, March 19, 2007
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
How would you like to have to file the following non-conformance report:
"Work to assigned document (IPLV-017) was performed prior to training by reading. Work was performed on a quality-affecting task; however, the work itself was not quality-affecting, as the pipettor in question (ID#:2380745) was used for a purpose not intended by the manufacturer of the pipettor, nor by the author of IPLV-017."
I almost wish I was making this up.
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
AIDS vs. Bipedal...-ism
Would it be better to get AIDS or lose a leg?
The reason I ask, see, is, me and my vivid imagination, we ahh, well, you probably know that part. Anyway, any night that I've stayed late at the library, (which is turning into most nights) I have to walk back the parking garage to get to my car. And I frequently imagine (not someone sneaking up behind me, because I could handle that with an elbow and a right hook), no my imagination goes for gold and the most frequent thought that pops into my head is someone shooting me with a tranq dart. Someone would really have to hate me to go to all that effort, and since I'm so loveable, this is probably wasted angst.
Anyway, the thought of tonight was, "What if it was a dart, not a tranq dart, but one loaded with a nasty virus, say AIDS?"
At which point, I realized that there wouldn't really be any bouncing back from that, because AIDS is pretty serious. Unless it hit me it the leg, and I badass-ly tourniqueted and lopped my leg off with a pocket knife. That might save me from the AIDS. Y'know, if I maim myself quickly enough.
So it brings me back to my original question. Would it be better to get AIDS or lose a leg?
Why, yes, it was a long day, why do you ask?
Oh, and for the record, if I ever do anything stupid enough to get AIDS, I will shoot myself.
The reason I ask, see, is, me and my vivid imagination, we ahh, well, you probably know that part. Anyway, any night that I've stayed late at the library, (which is turning into most nights) I have to walk back the parking garage to get to my car. And I frequently imagine (not someone sneaking up behind me, because I could handle that with an elbow and a right hook), no my imagination goes for gold and the most frequent thought that pops into my head is someone shooting me with a tranq dart. Someone would really have to hate me to go to all that effort, and since I'm so loveable, this is probably wasted angst.
Anyway, the thought of tonight was, "What if it was a dart, not a tranq dart, but one loaded with a nasty virus, say AIDS?"
At which point, I realized that there wouldn't really be any bouncing back from that, because AIDS is pretty serious. Unless it hit me it the leg, and I badass-ly tourniqueted and lopped my leg off with a pocket knife. That might save me from the AIDS. Y'know, if I maim myself quickly enough.
So it brings me back to my original question. Would it be better to get AIDS or lose a leg?
Why, yes, it was a long day, why do you ask?
Oh, and for the record, if I ever do anything stupid enough to get AIDS, I will shoot myself.
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Webcampus is UNLV's online something or other that hosts the online classes, or the online components of classes. I just won a flamewar on the educational psychology message board. My cousin is drinkingand talking about the fun of cutting flat worms in half, so she is unable to judge my geekiness. Anyone else want to estimate?
Friday, January 12, 2007
Monday, January 8, 2007
Saturday, January 6, 2007
Fun With Math
1. Start with the given:
CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR
2. Change all the U's to V's (which is proper latin anyway):
CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR
3. Extract all Roman numerals:
CVVLDIV
4. Convert to Arabic numbers:
100 5 5 50 500 1 5
5. Add all the numbers:
666
6. Thus Barney is Satan.
CUTE PURPLE DINOSAUR
2. Change all the U's to V's (which is proper latin anyway):
CVTE PVRPLE DINOSAVR
3. Extract all Roman numerals:
CVVLDIV
4. Convert to Arabic numbers:
100 5 5 50 500 1 5
5. Add all the numbers:
666
6. Thus Barney is Satan.
Friday, December 1, 2006
From CNN.com
Manitoba, Canada - The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The actions of President Bush are prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and agree with Bill O'Reilly or Sean Hannity.
Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, trial lawyers, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"
In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."
Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves.
"A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. "They did have a nice little Napa Valley Cabernet, though."
When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Bush Administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR races.
In recent days, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers on Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney hits to prove they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.
Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many English Literature or art-history majors does one country need?"
In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged that the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close to Cheney said. "We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The President is determined to reach out," he said.
Manitoba, Canada - The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The actions of President Bush are prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and agree with Bill O'Reilly or Sean Hannity.
Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, trial lawyers, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"
In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."
Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves.
"A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. "They did have a nice little Napa Valley Cabernet, though."
When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Bush Administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR races.
In recent days, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers on Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney hits to prove they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.
Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies. "I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many English Literature or art-history majors does one country need?"
In an effort to ease tensions between the United States and Canada, Vice President Dick Cheney met with the Canadian ambassador and pledged that the administration would take steps to reassure liberals, a source close to Cheney said. "We're going to have some Peter, Paul & Mary concerts. And we might put some endangered species on postage stamps. The President is determined to reach out," he said.
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
Implements
Today, I actually thought about the specific heat of yarn.
...and:
Gratuitous Thanksgiving joke for those who actually get it:
...and:
Gratuitous Thanksgiving joke for those who actually get it:
 |
Monday, November 6, 2006
Wednesday, November 1, 2006
Left or right?
I think that my biggest problem in life might be that I can't decide whether I'm a fascist or a libertarian.
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
So that Aerik may witness my shame...
Aynsee (7:29:36 PM): twenty-twenty-twenty-eight hours to go-a-oh...
--- (7:29:49 PM): i wanna be sedated
--- (7:29:56 PM): nothing to do no way to go home
--- (7:29:59 PM): i wanna be sedated
Aynsee (7:30:08 PM): put me in a wheelshair
--- (7:30:17 PM): get me to the show
Aynsee (7:30:27 PM): hurry hurry hurry
--- (7:30:28 PM): hurry hurry hurry before i go let's go
Aynsee (7:30:41 PM): oh oh oh oh OHHH!!!
--- (7:30:46 PM): i can't control my fingers i can't control my toes
--- (7:30:52 PM): then your line
Aynsee (7:30:57 PM): oops
Aynsee (7:30:59 PM): i suck
--- (7:29:49 PM): i wanna be sedated
--- (7:29:56 PM): nothing to do no way to go home
--- (7:29:59 PM): i wanna be sedated
Aynsee (7:30:08 PM): put me in a wheelshair
--- (7:30:17 PM): get me to the show
Aynsee (7:30:27 PM): hurry hurry hurry
--- (7:30:28 PM): hurry hurry hurry before i go let's go
Aynsee (7:30:41 PM): oh oh oh oh OHHH!!!
--- (7:30:46 PM): i can't control my fingers i can't control my toes
--- (7:30:52 PM): then your line
Aynsee (7:30:57 PM): oops
Aynsee (7:30:59 PM): i suck
Friday, October 20, 2006
Thursday, October 19, 2006
Oh, P-Chem!
Today, my Thermodynamics professor re-affirmed that turkeys do not, in fact, undergo phase transfer.
And, a special conversation from after class...
"He puts the 'man' in thermodynamics."
"Aynsley, there's no 'man' in thermodynamics."
"Well, even then, it kind of works..."
Oh, and the Gibbs free energy of diamond is less than the Gibbs free energy of graphite.
And, a special conversation from after class...
"He puts the 'man' in thermodynamics."
"Aynsley, there's no 'man' in thermodynamics."
"Well, even then, it kind of works..."
Oh, and the Gibbs free energy of diamond is less than the Gibbs free energy of graphite.
Sunday, October 8, 2006
I have decided that I also want a margarita fairy. I intend to hide him under my bed. And I say him, because I would like it to be a true fairy, and so must be a completely flaming gay man. Who make awesome bartenders, for reasons I do not fathom.
Thoughts for the moment:
"If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neck-ties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?"-Linda Ellerbee
"Talking with a man is like trying to saddle a cow. You work like hell, but what's the point?"-Gladys Upham
Oh, last edit, the best quote from this weekend:
"Listen to her, she's a scientist, she knows what's she talking about...unlike you." -"grown-up" frat boy, about me, to his louder friend
Thoughts for the moment:
"If men can run the world, why can't they stop wearing neck-ties? How intelligent is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck?"-Linda Ellerbee
"Talking with a man is like trying to saddle a cow. You work like hell, but what's the point?"-Gladys Upham
Oh, last edit, the best quote from this weekend:
"Listen to her, she's a scientist, she knows what's she talking about...unlike you." -"grown-up" frat boy, about me, to his louder friend
Tuesday, October 3, 2006
I would like to believe that one's own thoughts and opinions need not be advertised. This is not a line drawn in the dirt, like every other post that says "Repost this if X", because if you don't repost X, you obviously hate anyone and everything associated with X. Lines in the dirt are for middle-schoolers, or Peter Pan in Hook. If you don't want to repost X, then it says nothing about you either way, except that you either want to keep your mouth closed, or are intelligent enough to express your opinions without a pre-prepared statement written by someone in an attempt to challenge and shame everyone to immediately supporting X.
And for the record, I am against gay rights. I am also against women's rights, (insert minority title here)'s rights, and every other other bullshit subcategory subset of the populations's rights. The only rights I am for are human rights.
Edit: Ironically, someone re-posted this.
And for the record, I am against gay rights. I am also against women's rights, (insert minority title here)'s rights, and every other other bullshit subcategory subset of the populations's rights. The only rights I am for are human rights.
Edit: Ironically, someone re-posted this.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
From my Analytical Chem book
"At Girl Scout Camp, Chastity proved to be precise, but not accurate."
Let me go ponder that one for a while.
Monday, September 4, 2006
Liberal-Baiting Day
So, while I know most of my 'readers' are liberals...this 'womyn' was just dumb. (What's the singular version of 'womyn'? Does it exist?) And I don't like Spam, whether a bot or a human sends it. My penis is large enough, thank you.
Anyway, I was pissed off by the e-mail and I felt like playing. There are a total of four,but I'm too lazy to re-sequence them for you, so you'll have to read from the bottom up. (Notice, however, I am not too lazy to write extensively about my laziness. Hmmm...) I think she gave up, or just had no response when I accused her of sexism, which she obviously thinks 'womyn' are incapable of. It's just really funny. But, I digress. Here is the funny. If you disagree with me, feel free to send her an e-mail telling her that I am a hateful conservative asshole. But don't send me one.
Email #1
On 9/4/06, Nancy Hulse wrote:
Anti-Violence Education reduced fee ;
Hello ,
I am sending you this letter to let you know that I have recently booked
shows in your area during the months of September and October .
My live multimedia performances about violence against women
are a powerful and exciting way to educate about this important issue.
I would like to offer you the opportunity to bring one of my unique educational
programs to your campus at a reduced cost. If you are interested,
please contact me as soon as possible.
If you are not familiar with my work, please visit my website at http://www.womynkind.org
Thank you for your consideration, I look forward to hearing from you.
Nancy Hulse
Womynkind Productions
nhulse@womynkind.org
http://www.womynkind.org
1-888-578-9847
SPAM disclaimer: I sent this email to you because I believe that you may be
interested in my work due to your position. Each email I send is individually
delivered via a web page that has your email-link on it.You are NOT on a
mailing list. Womynkind is a not-for-profit educational / arts organization.
If you are not interested in my work, please forward my address to someone
you think might be.
Email #2
----- Original Message -----
From: Aynsley
To: Nancy Hulse
Sent: Monday, September 04, 2006 11:40 AM
Subject: Re:
Please do not send unsolicited e-mail, regardless of whether or not you think someone may be interested in paying you money to tell them things they already know in a new and exciting fashion! I do not appreciate receiving e-mails from complete strangers. I also feel that the spelling of 'womyn' is a concept so idiotic that only a liberal whose mind is so open that her brains fell out could embrace it. Please desist in insulting me.
Email #3
On 9/4/06, Nancy Hulse wrote:
SHAME ON YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Email #4
From: Aynsley
To: Nancy Hulse
Date: Sep 4, 2006 9:13 AM
Subject: Re: Re:
What? You don't appreciate my opinion that you are an idiot? Or maybe you dislike me because I don't embrace your man-hating ways? Perhaps you misunderstand. While I am a domestic violence advocate, I am more inclined to fight for the under-represented victims. Men, who are beaten and maligned by their gay partners as well as men who are viciously verbally beat and manipulated by their female partners. I feel that everyone who is hurt by someone else deserves a voice, not just a subset of 'womyn'.
Anyway, I was pissed off by the e-mail and I felt like playing. There are a total of four,
Email #1
On 9/4/06, Nancy Hulse
Anti-Violence Education reduced fee ;
Hello ,
I am sending you this letter to let you know that I have recently booked
shows in your area during the months of September and October .
My live multimedia performances about violence against women
are a powerful and exciting way to educate about this important issue.
I would like to offer you the opportunity to bring one of my unique educational
programs to your campus at a reduced cost. If you are interested,
please contact me as soon as possible.
If you are not familiar with my work, please visit my website at http://www.womynkind.org
Thank you for your consideration, I look forward to hearing from you.
Nancy Hulse
Womynkind Productions
nhulse@womynkind.org
http://www.womynkind.org
1-888-578-9847
SPAM disclaimer: I sent this email to you because I believe that you may be
interested in my work due to your position. Each email I send is individually
delivered via a web page that has your email-link on it.You are NOT on a
mailing list. Womynkind is a not-for-profit educational / arts organization.
If you are not interested in my work, please forward my address to someone
you think might be.
Email #2
----- Original Message -----
From: Aynsley
To: Nancy Hulse
Sent: Monday, September 04, 2006 11:40 AM
Subject: Re:
Please do not send unsolicited e-mail, regardless of whether or not you think someone may be interested in paying you money to tell them things they already know in a new and exciting fashion! I do not appreciate receiving e-mails from complete strangers. I also feel that the spelling of 'womyn' is a concept so idiotic that only a liberal whose mind is so open that her brains fell out could embrace it. Please desist in insulting me.
Email #3
On 9/4/06, Nancy Hulse
SHAME ON YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Email #4
From: Aynsley
To: Nancy Hulse
Date: Sep 4, 2006 9:13 AM
Subject: Re: Re:
What? You don't appreciate my opinion that you are an idiot? Or maybe you dislike me because I don't embrace your man-hating ways? Perhaps you misunderstand. While I am a domestic violence advocate, I am more inclined to fight for the under-represented victims. Men, who are beaten and maligned by their gay partners as well as men who are viciously verbally beat and manipulated by their female partners. I feel that everyone who is hurt by someone else deserves a voice, not just a subset of 'womyn'.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
I finally got to use calculus in physics! It was neat! And I surprised the professor (Crazy German #1) by knowing what a power series was. And I confused my other chemistry professor by asking him to explain an equation. He confused himself so badly that he decided to make our labs reports due 5 days later so that he could figure it out and explain it in class. Victory mine.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Monday, August 28, 2006
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Proof that Josh does not go against his word:
http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f103/ishmaella/smile.jpg.
http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f103/ishmaella/pretty.jpg
http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f103/ishmaella/smile.jpg.
http://i46.photobucket.com/albums/f103/ishmaella/pretty.jpg
Monday, July 17, 2006
Thursday, July 13, 2006
The story on why I'm shrinking:
It's my own damn fault.
One of the reasons is because I hate milk, so I apparently have weaker bones. The rest of the story is more interesting. I don't really sleep enough, what with working my way through college. It turns out that this has actual, tangible effects on my long-term health, one of which is the shrinking. When you're asleep, or at least lying down, your spine decompresses. When your spine doesn't decompress, it starts to grind a little bit. Or so I was told.
There's also one more maybe-reason that was mentioned. My weight went down a lot last fall. I've managed to put most of what feels like normal weight to me back on. (A difference of 40 lbs). Although I have a large skeletal build, I am still "overweight"...okay...the weight that I gained back this spring is apparently pulling too hard on my weak bones, also causing shortness.
So, between all of this, I apparently need to lose 40 lbs again, by exercise, since malnutrition is ten kinds of not-fun, and also find time to spend eight hours a day in bed. Damn it. Maybe I can deal with shrinking instead?
It's my own damn fault.
One of the reasons is because I hate milk, so I apparently have weaker bones. The rest of the story is more interesting. I don't really sleep enough, what with working my way through college. It turns out that this has actual, tangible effects on my long-term health, one of which is the shrinking. When you're asleep, or at least lying down, your spine decompresses. When your spine doesn't decompress, it starts to grind a little bit. Or so I was told.
There's also one more maybe-reason that was mentioned. My weight went down a lot last fall. I've managed to put most of what feels like normal weight to me back on. (A difference of 40 lbs). Although I have a large skeletal build, I am still "overweight"...okay...the weight that I gained back this spring is apparently pulling too hard on my weak bones, also causing shortness.
So, between all of this, I apparently need to lose 40 lbs again, by exercise, since malnutrition is ten kinds of not-fun, and also find time to spend eight hours a day in bed. Damn it. Maybe I can deal with shrinking instead?
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
I'm not delusional, and this has nothing to do with lack of sleep. I'm shrinking. I'm down to 5'7" (The last time I checked myself was last summer, 5'8" then).
This might sound obnoxious, but I'm a little worried. I don't drink milk, but I was sure I got enough calcium. But losing an inch, especially at 21, seems a little extreme to just be laughed off. I think I might actually call Mark and talk to him about this...
This might sound obnoxious, but I'm a little worried. I don't drink milk, but I was sure I got enough calcium. But losing an inch, especially at 21, seems a little extreme to just be laughed off. I think I might actually call Mark and talk to him about this...
Monday, July 3, 2006
Sunday, July 2, 2006
Life is good. I'm done with school for the summer, I got an A. (The prof told me as I was leaving.) I'm calling one of the grad schools I was invited to attend tomorrow, to see if my invitation would still stand, if I were to choose not to finish my philosophy degree. I'm pretty sure I'm done with Hartwick philosophy, but I think I'd like to earn my Ph.D for it at some point. While I know this is no walk in the park, I don't think I'd have too much trouble, as both McFarlane and Rocknak had no doubt that I would breeze (comparatively) through the thesis.
It might seem like a waste of time to the rest of you, but since I want to work for the FBI, I don't think I'm overqualifying myself. They like over-educated people. So, I have this next year to get my grades up, and hopefully I'll do the internship there summer of 2008.
The waters are receding, I'm all moved in and in a flutter of domesticity (Liz is coming over to bake pies and make fried chicken with me today), school is done, and someone very special has walked back into my life. I needed a pick-me-up, but this is like...never mind, I won't describe it. Josh already told me I'm dopey.
Working is rough, but it'll be a lot easier with no school work except thesis prep. I'm only working 4 jobs this summer, for a rough total of about 90 a week. That's down from last summer, but I'm spoiling myself a little this year.
I got a new cell phone, and my dad, as usual, went above and beyond. He asked what kind of phone I wanted, I said I really didn't care, but a flip phone would be nice, so it wouldn't get all scratched up in my pocket. He, of course, got me a camera-phone, so watch out! I've been playing with it.
Life is good.
It might seem like a waste of time to the rest of you, but since I want to work for the FBI, I don't think I'm overqualifying myself. They like over-educated people. So, I have this next year to get my grades up, and hopefully I'll do the internship there summer of 2008.
The waters are receding, I'm all moved in and in a flutter of domesticity (Liz is coming over to bake pies and make fried chicken with me today), school is done, and someone very special has walked back into my life. I needed a pick-me-up, but this is like...never mind, I won't describe it. Josh already told me I'm dopey.
Working is rough, but it'll be a lot easier with no school work except thesis prep. I'm only working 4 jobs this summer, for a rough total of about 90 a week. That's down from last summer, but I'm spoiling myself a little this year.
I got a new cell phone, and my dad, as usual, went above and beyond. He asked what kind of phone I wanted, I said I really didn't care, but a flip phone would be nice, so it wouldn't get all scratched up in my pocket. He, of course, got me a camera-phone, so watch out! I've been playing with it.
Life is good.
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